DATELINE: January 29th, 2015
It was a vain and foolish thing to follow the programming of the department and file for restraint. The only thing that is protected, other than ego, is the corruption that will only further divide what might have at one time been a real family. The worst thing about being an informed and fully realized human being is the non-stop slander and criticism by those who would seek to protect their comfortable paycheck or apathy (Greek for ‘without feeling’ [read: almost everyone]).
We are at a critical time in world history. The debt is outrageous, indicating that there really is no base for the circulating currency. The minimum wage rising means nothing when the price of groceries rises in suit. TV is teaching the kids really bad stuff, like how to be prematurely sexualized and conditioned to value materialism over personal development. There are forces at play in the world which are condemnable on many levels, and require a counterbalance to equilibriate.
It is my struggle, to sit here, with the information of the world at my fingertips, and wonder ultimately, why can I not father the daughter of my own seed? A daughter for whom I wish nothing but the best, whom I wish to equip with the knowledge and foresight to separate the informational wheat from the chaff, and to know when Disney or Barbie or whatever else force there might be is trying to manipulate her self-image and relationship with the world. I can be a strong male role model in her life, someone on whom she can rely. Someone who doesn’t pay for love, someone who doesn’t cow-tow to the corrupt wielders of fear and intimidation. I can impart values that are of some traditional quality, and express the importance for self actualization and individuality and critical thinking and an insatiable curiosity about the workings of the world.
I am guilty of no offense involving my daughter. Coral Rose loves me, and we have a happy relationship with each other, we always have. You may be doing some good on your end by punishing me by continuing to play keep-away with my beloved biological daughter–in that you may sense a sort of victory. Congratulations! You are depriving Coral of the best possible thing she could EVER hope to experience in her early childhood, which is the support, love, and interaction of a really good Dad, based not on externalized concepts of what a Dad does or should be, but on the actual internal and real qualities which I intend to pass onto my daughter through imprint and teaching, through play and learning.
But by all means, if it is a better thing that she is raised by the state similarly to our Greco-Roman predecessors, that she is raised in the box (read: television) which will show with such power and effect the worst qualities of youth and humanity in general, that she is disallowed from experiencing the true love harbored by her real Dad, that she is so heavily conditioned by decisions that are completely and utterly farcical arbitrations based on some kind of unspoken opinions, if indeed these are better things then yea, by all means TAKE HER.
I can take my lumps. You’re only punishing Coral.
You may be wondering, Broox, why the music? What could that possibly have to do with Coral Rose? Well, this is music that I plan to implement in an uplifting album I will soon create to round off my GHOSTS – UNDERGROUND series. The final and upcoming album, RISE UP & DANCE, is a tribute to all the good things in cue. I sense positivity and justice, a righting of that which has been wrong, just around the corner. In an effort to fight the disharmony in my life, I will create this album as a balm, a medicinal weapon to create a peaceful and happy space. I will deploy this weapon and share it with the world, that the others going through their own personal plights might be able to let the music play and find that zone of inspiration, a place far removed from the darkness.
It is therapeutic for me to post songs that I would share with Coral. As a DJ, I have been collecting music for a dozen or more years from all genres, but especially of electronic music, which is the genre the world has embraced as its future progresses. And so when I have Coral, when I get my short session of parenthood, I push myself to expose her to more and more progressive and intricate productions, the kind of songs that shine above the bulk of the art. In this, my hopes and expectations are that her mathematical and rhythmic faculties will be advanced ahead of schedule. I remember when I was young, in the days of dial-up and Napster, I was overjoyed if three of the six songs I wanted to download overnight had completed. Mission accomplished! I now possessed music from the other side of the globe, so fresh it was still wet, having just been dropped on the BBC Radio 1 or topping the UK Dance Charts. I was the kid at school with the most cutting edge sounds that would not be for sale in our local record stores for another two or three years.
Now, the music comes down at a rate nearly impossible to review in sum. I am lucky to listen to internet radio and pick up on some good frequencies, seek, and then finally attain the music in real time. It is a beautiful thing, and Coral will not have to know the rigors of staying up alongside an old AOL connection with fingers and eyes crossed and the frustrating excruciation from those old days of download purgatory. I have put together a collection of what I consider to be the most potently inspirational and cleansing music that my dozen plus years of being a DJ could possibly have gleaned throughout the entire informational spectrum of that era. It is my hope that whether or not I am allowed to see her, that somehow, through the frequency and airwaves, through the sheer force of heart and power of music that somehow, maybe I can still reach her.
I love you so much, Coral.
*If one were to listen very closely, one might detect that Orbital used the sample of an infant’s heart, in utero, to provide the rhythmic backbone of this haunting entrancing classic, The Girl With The Sun In Her Head.
DATELINE: January 27th, 2015
When Aliza and I were together, and before Coral was brewing, I remember a conversation we had about IQ. I had never previously given the idea a single thought! After taking an unofficial IQ test earlier this year, my deepest fears were confirmed. Compared to the bell curve for that particular site, I was in some savagely high bracket that put me in the class of weirdos like Bill Nye, or Stephen Hawking.
I have to lean toward thankful when I consider that Aliza is of spectacular intelligence, and that some of the “impedances” we experienced earlier in our lives, either together or separately, were symptoms and indicators of that high strangeness the experts sometimes call “intelligence,” which all in all is really just the ability to learn. It’s all fine and good until an overly bright specimen gets misdiagnosed and wrongly medicated, which is contraindicated in all circumstances. Despite what I want for my daughter, when I watch her interact with the world–the bright spark in her eye, and the enthusiasm and effort which go into challenging the new–I can almost be certain that my worst fears are also true: she is a “gifted-person.” Thank God for that awesome sense of humor and social grace–stuff she must have gotten from Mom.
Here is a website with a breakdown of what life is like for the gifted, which I found insightful and yet *yawn* dull.
Ah, joy! I just found this EXCELLENT app for kids that teaches logical block programming in a fun way, it’s even better than the Angry Birds programming at code.org, which Coral adored. You just like, drag the code blocks and help the cop catch the monster, and it makes good sense because the little blocks are animated, showing you what the cop or construction worker will do, and it rewards you for making the right moves with coins and stars and all that kewl bling bling. Learning got a hell of a lot cuter since when I was a kid.
I think my favorite part about spending time with Coral, is putting her in front of some new problem or discovery and seeing her figure it out. Like when I opened up her singing teapot to show her where the batteries go, and how it can’t sing without the batteries because they provide it power. She gets it right away, no mystery or magic there, it’s just another fact added to her rapid development. She will get frustrated if understimulated though, so to get her to focus I may have to put on a decent anime film (usually Miyazaki) and play some quiet downtempo music and then she’ll start building the blocks instead of knocking them down or she’ll focus on drawing circles instead of scribbling. It’s like cracking a safe, but more worth it in the end. She remarkably reminds me of someone else when he was just a little guy.
The Foos is free at the android play store–nice.
They’re offering what in school for five year olds in the UK?
I remember joking around w/ Aliza before Coral was born about how Coral would probably have me wrapped around her little finger, run up and kick me in the shin and announce “pwned!” (Pronounced: poned)
I have recently discovered that “pwned” is actually a netsec term which indicates when a target system has been compromised. Completely apropos given the nature of my present course of study, and the way that lil’ Rosebud has more or less entirely compromised my heart.
DATELINE: January 22, 2015
Ah I just found out that Coral Rose is sick with a cough, and it deeply affects me, especially considering that I was not able to visit with her on Tuesday or today–to feed her oranges and “leaves” (raw baby spinach), which she devours with gusto! My soul aches to put peppermint oil on her head, which always helps me breathe clearly and smells wonderful, but I’ll have to settle for Grandpa going to visit her and bring her this token of my absence.
The only thing better than eating this freshly baked made-from-scratch handmade curry and whole wheat crusted red’n’white sauced spinache and tomato pizza, would be to share it with my daughter who I cannot see today.
On behalf of Coral Rose, and our cause, I would like to thank all my supporters and folks who provide traffic and spread awareness of my website. We have nearly 600 views to savecoralrose.wordpress.com now, and views from USA, Albania, Australia, Germany, Mexico, and Canada.
With the help of my facebook & twitter campaign, the traffic for the past week has been astronomical! Thank you so much for all your likes, shares, and tweets. Awareness is the weapon which shall win the war for the future, which is fought in the hearts, souls, and minds of the very people.
God bless you all!
DATELINE: January 21, 2015
“The Court does find that it is in the best interest of [Coral] to spend more time with her father.” –Magistrate Pannell, Courtroom 2A, Larimer County Justice Center, November 2014
“The purpose of the department is to reunite children with their parents.” –Caseworker Maggie Brooks, Larimer County Department of Human Services, December 2013
Why, then, did I miss my regularly appointed visit with Coral Rose yesterday? Why wasn’t she allowed to see her Daddy, though the Court decided that she absolutely should for her best interests? I could not afford to pay for the quick-tests ordered by Magistrate Pannell, which are $20 per dip, in addition to the transfer fees of Harmony House which are $8 per transfer. A little arithmetic is in order here: One week of services would total $56 American, so for one months visits, totalling 32 hours of time with my daughter (minus the driving time to and from the transfers), I am required to spend a whopping $224! In ye olde days that was called none other than ransom.
I was told by Maggie Brooks, way back when this case was first opened, that anything required by the department would be covered in costs. That would include drug tests, right? That would include visits and transfers at the Harmony House, right?
For the record, I could not possibly be more sober at the present time and for many moons now. A hair follicle test that was administered in October also indicated negative for all substances, and those are accurate for 90 days prior to testing. Magpie and the Yates creature have the go-ahead from Magistrate Pannell to alter or modify the necessity of my quick-tests. The court finding that it is indeed in my daughter’s best interests to have a Daddy, at least for the measly eight hours per week, why then doesn’t Maggie or Julie do something to make sure that the Court’s orders are fulfilled?
I’m going to speculate and go out on a limb here, but I suppose it might be because I have called them out for their criminal conduct more befitting a dictator’s intelligence cartel than what their masquerade would pretend, whose “purpose is to reunite children with their parents.”
There is nothing more in the world I love to do than face off with you in the court of justice where your fabrications and illusions are clearly washed by the light of truth, the light which I am left to wield as a lonely soldier fighting his way back home, away from your lies and slaughter to be back with wives and daughters.
Looking forward to it with relish.
The cutest thing happened the other day: Coral was over for a visit once and I had told her how when she was just a *little* baby I had wrapped her in her special baby blankets like a little burrito. Last time she was over she said, “Daddy, I want wrap like a ‘rrito please!”
It’s ok to laugh sometimes.
I can hardly wait to show Coral that these several-years-old pepper seeds we planted on Thursday–only three days before this posting–are already germinated! She’ll be almost as geeked as Daddy is. It may look like a bundle of dirt now, but through practical application and fastidious instruction, my three year-old daughter already knows that eventually, it will become food that we can eat together.
DATELINE: January 18th, 2015
For those of you who continually visit my page day after day, examining in fine detail the updates that I present, who I suspect not to be friends of my cause but rather bitter rivals; greetings.
I have a new platform and startling revelation for you all. Something you will have never seen coming–and contrary to what you may be thinking, nothing to fear whatsoever! This undertaking holds much gravity for us all, and it has been quite the adventure. But as we draw to a close in our (present) legal proceedings, I am increasing in wisdom by manifold daily.
If I were a betting man, then I would take it to the bank that what I am presently withholding for sake of impetus will somehow make you all proud to have participated in the debacle known as 13JV514. No matter what your suspicions may be telling you, I can guarantee that what I am mysteriously outlining here will be entirely contrary to any fears or doubts that manifest in prevalence.
You need not concern yourself with this statement, just know that I will not have the opportunity to reveal my position until February the 18th, when it may be my last opportunity to present to any and all involved in the well-being and safe-keeping of Coral Rose.
“For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.”
DATELINE: January 14, 2015
Julie, now that I know that I have your attention, please, let us fully embrace and delight in the momentous occasion when you saw fit to stand by an unlawful request to have a man’s rights be removed–when he is in fact a concerned father who is doing the best to expose what tyrants like you are doing to his and his daughter’s lives.
Mythical Beast Julie Yates, the conscripted attorney who advocated on behalf of Coral’s best interest, the self-same courtroom monstrosity who saw fit to wave her lawyer hands around the air like a medium in trance as she described to Magistrate Pannell how “DISREGULATED” I am, actually dug up some material and will try to stand against this very website–to actually encroach upon my rights guaranteed by the First Amendment. By her logic what she is setting forth in this attack on my rights would mean in essence that I could not post pictures of Coral on Facebook, I could not use her “legal” name in any documentation. It is clear what’s burning her buns is that I am posting legal documents, which are public domain if I wish to make them so. Here is the magical document which she produced, and I have now made public domain:
DATELINE: January 13, 2015
Although my website and message has not yet reached the millions (billions) I hope it will someday reach, as of today the site has 419 page views. That doesn’t necessarily account for the edits and glances I take at it, or any repeat visitors, but let’s safely say that there have been maybe 300 unique page visits since the inception of savecoralrose.wordpress.com
It’s a beautiful thing.
Please help the momentum grow by throwing Coral Rose and her cause a like, a share, and pass it on. Don’t let what’s happening to her happen to your children. Don’t let what’s happening to me happen to you. The children are the future, and they’re worth it.
DATELINE: January 12, 2015
I receive in the mail a motion filed by my ex-attorney Mark Workman, showing rebuttal against Aliza’s motion to impede my rights to post this information. I stated clearly in an e-mail to the Workman Law Office,
149 West Oak Street, Fort Collins, CO 80524
dated December 12th of this past year that he was to withdraw from my case. There are various reasons as to why I no longer seek the counsel of this esteemed barrister, but mainly I want him out because it was becoming apparent that he did not care for Coral Rose or the outcome of this case whatsoever. Just another case on his desk, and when I came over after being called by his receptionist, his sighs and moans and retort of “I guess I’ll just have to work late tonight!” It was 3:30 pm. “Don’t come to my office unless you have an appointment!” He exclaims to me that.
“Your receptionist called me here to sign some papers.”
That’s the day I fired him, and he is still interfering with my case, like a zombie that refuses to die. I have made it known to the clerk of Larimer County Justice Center 2A, and the other clerk in that same court, and all the attorneys of all parties, and God and all His angels, that Mark Workman is no longer representing me and will incur this sort of response from any further involvement in my or my daughter’s lives.
In an email with subject title “Cease and Desist,” written minutes ago, I reiterate:
This is not a platform about conspiracy, this is a platform to demonstrate an AGENDA. Privacy, security, and family are at stake–and my life is deeply affected by what is being perpetuated against me by Larimer County Department of Human Services, and the master that pulls their strings to the dance of marginalizing and daemonizing a determined, upright, and intelligent father.
My opinon? Coral Rose deserves a Dad who stands up for TRUTH.
“Let JUSTICE be done though the heavens may fall. . .”
Mom just filed this motion to have my website altered or shut down. According to the first amendment to the Constitution of The United States Of America:
“Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.”
This is getting really hot. So in her “petition to the government for a redress of grievances,” she is demonstrating that she is somehow above or separate from the law. My answer to you is, read the fine print. Law is law, and it is codified, and when you break the law there are consequences. In my righteous approach to these injustices, I am invincible. This is in Coral’s BEST INTERESTS, and you will not subvert my rights.
DATELINE: December 18th, 2014
Magistrate Pannell’s response to the issue of her court order that SHOULD have allowed for a total of 10 visits with my daughter, though only 3 have been facilitated, was “You’re all going to have to get along.”
My response was to WALK STRAIGHT OUT of that Kangaroo Courtroom to continue my efforts toward saving my daughter the only way I know how, by standing up for my rights and drawing as much attention to this subject as humanly possible. Obviously my rights are in violation, obviously so are Coral’s. Aliza, Coral’s mom is lying, the caseworker Maggie Brooks is lying. The guardian ad litem Julie Yates is assisting with the lies. How is it that the unrighteous go rewarded and unpunished? How is it that the magistrate, a judicial officer of the land, has no mechanism in place to ensure the following of her law? She was stern with Aliza, saying, the order is in place and that’s that, and yet this ensures nothing.
I filmed some of the notorious parties involved in my daughter’s case, and the responses were hilarious. It was a real treat to watch Aliza approach a deputy and ask him to interfere with my rights to free speech and to assemble. The deputy, a Sargent, whose name I neglected to remember due to my impassioned state of mind, was very understanding and receptive, and though I cannot ascertain whether or not he was in agreeance with my stance, he certainly agreed that no one’s rights should be attacked.
That was my little victory for the day. Stay posted for more updates. I am gaining support every time I talk to another parent with similar issues, and believe me, there are many myriad of them in my neck of the woods alone fighting for their children without support. I found my purpose.
Tomorrow, Thursday, December 18th, we all go to court for a review hearing. I swear to God it feels like this when I face off against the many headed behemoth that hides behind the mask called JUSTICE. Say a prayer for Coral.
Everytime I fall asleep I wake with the coppery taste of JUSTICE in my forebrain:
To Caseworker in Coral’s case:
Maggie Brooks! Why are you suspicious of me? Is it because you don’t like me, because I’m smart, unique? Is it because I thwart your authority and position? Is it uncharacteristic of a man to stand up for the love of his daughter? That is no platform to behave unprofessionally and justify your lies and all the damage you have caused me! Coral deserves a dad no less loving and concerned than myself–I won’t be satisfied until I taste the salty rage of JUSTICE, and usher you safely OUT OF HER CASE!
Another update, these thoughts came to me in my sleep, and I realized how discordant this jazz is truly becoming:
Having slept on the issue of my daughter being illegally kidnapped by a federal agency posturing and masquerading as a local entity avowed to “protect” our children, whose main purpose seems to be keeping the child in at-risk environment where job security is ensured, I came to these conclusive concrete subjects of particular perturbation:
1.) Having discussed Maggie Brooks and her criminal methodology of utilizing lies and vagaries in regards to the rights and actions of this father (read: self) toward the end of being able to spend more time with his daughter, it became clear in court that she was caught sticky fingered with her cat paws deep in the cookie jar. So here’s the issue as it stands: I have asked and pleaded on numerous occasions to receive a DIFFERENT caseworker, as it is impossible to trust such a snakey individual to fulfill her professional faculty. My request has never been taken seriously, and therefore has not been granted. I am still forced to communicate with Maggie via e-mail, which makes me sick to my very soul to engage in any further interchange with such a wanton and corrupt official.
2.) Julie Yates, the mythical beast I describe below as Guardian Ad Litem in “favor” of Coral. Stands up at the end of the last court date and uses her grand gesticulations to demonstrate in the air an imaginary chart which clearly shows Magistrate Carolyn Pannell how “DISREGULATED” I am. This deeply infuriated me–so I suppose Ms. Yates is also a mental health specialist who can make spot diagnoses in the court room and wave her hand around to such affect? Here’s the issue: Magistrate Pannell ordered in my glorious victory which I struggled so hard to earn, which has not even been in fact carried out, that Ms. Yates be allowed to come over to our house to watch my interaction with Coral Rose. I’m sorry, but after that flamboyant display of her extemporaneous psychiatry, I might be feeling too DISREGULATED to put up with her in my house while I catch up on much belated parenting time with Coral Rose.
3.) I have not beat around the bush whatsoever about my experience with the Department, and have requested a separate, third-party objective investigation into Maggie Brooks and the Department’s actions in regards to my fatherhood and Coral’s placement be launched in earnest. No one has made an effort to provide a satisfactory arrangement to look into this–and I found out why! There IS NO OVERSIGHT for the Larimer County Department of Human Services! They are indeed a federal entity, which used my THC use as a platform to slander and demonize me to keep my daughter from me, when the law of the land would otherwise allow any of the millions of other parents out there to enjoy their God-given rights to parenthood. But I digress, it’s not about the pot, it’s about Coral! It’s about justice! It’s about what IS and what ISN’T right!
It isn’t right that the lumbering beast with the face of Maggie Brooks–liar, tyrant, criminal–should go to and fro across OUR LANDS and illegally WITHHOLD OUR CHILDREN while getting paid to do so. This is awful and wrong. The issue: In light of all this which I made very clear during my testimony, Magistrate Carolyn Pannell’s solution was, and I quote, “You’ll all just have to learn how to communicate with each other!”
I’m sorry, I went to Larimer County (in)Justice Center on November 13th for justice, and found out sadly that it was really JUST US.
The following excerpt is an update regarding some pertinent issues to the case, my protest, and my feelings about things:
I know it’s a sin, but I’m quite proud of my work. Mark Workman, my attorney with whom I’ve wrestled on several issues and must attribute a great deal of any successes I have attained, is filing for contempt against Aliza. I shook the cage, now the spiders are fighting. It’s incredible to see so much result from fearless brazen tomfoolery. Everyone told me not to do this, but I knew it was the little fear inside of them, the devil in the world, trying to stop me from standing up for what I cherish most. It doesn’t take a savant to realize that’s all wrong. It only takes a dad.
Just now, I realized, my heart goes out to Aliza. She’s had a hard life and been so wronged, and I’m not being manipulated by her charm or games to feel for her, so it must be pretty genuine. I know how hard it must be, and I usually feel myself in the position to say that she earned it or called it upon herself, but truly, she has been a victim in many ways. Being a victim for so long will make anyone a bit villainous–you begin to want to take your power back at any cost. She must feel furious and sad and alone, and that’s understandable, and unfortunate.
I cannot tell her that I feel like my purpose in the world, or her world as it were, was not to make her life more difficult than it already was. And it would be true to say that I did indeed love her deeply when we were together, and still remember the way she used to quip frequently and give me the razz and make me laugh–all things at which she excelled with finesse; all things which she has undoubtedly passed onto my hilarious and entertaining daughter. No, my purpose was not to hurt her and shame her immeasurably: It was to help her grow up, and accept the maturity and responsibility of being a mother, and a life beyond addiction.
Though our time together was brief, she taught me things that I shall never forget in a thousand thousand lifetimes, for Aliza Rose is wise beyond her years. This is not an apology–but an ultimate reckoning of all things past and all to come. She deserves respect.
I suppose she may never agree, and always harbor a grudge in her breast against me, and I have made up my mind to focus and pray that this is not so. If one can be free of the chains and bonds of heroin, one can easily shake free the shackles of hatred and vendetta. There is simply no room in a happy soul for such daemons.
There is nothing more I could wish for her, despite the present state of our custody battle. Coral Rose is the best of both our parts, and none of the bad. Let her be both our inspirations to be our highest selves possible. Aliza is worth it. I’m worth it. And most of all, Coral Rose is worth it.